Wednesday, December 9, 2009

What Do I Do When My Child Ask For A Diaper Now And Then

The answer to this question is directly related to your potty training personality. Can you be flexible with losing faith? Can you introduce a little inconsistency without confusing your child? Can you say "NO" while still acknowledging his underlying need?

Try to understand what lies behind his request. Is there a new sibling in the house? Is your child having doubts about growing up? Is this a request for attentions or for reassurance? Attentions with out reassurance will lead to more request for attentions and escalate the situation. Attention with reassurance will meet your child's needs and allow him to continue to move forward.

Choose the response that feels right to you:

  • Say, " OKAY, JUST THIS ONE SPECIAL TIME." Have a special follow up conversation with your child. Why, questions are difficult for three year olds to answer, so try to explore the situation in other ways. Instead ask " HOW DOES IT FEEL TO WEAR A DIAPER AGAIN?" or "DO YOU WANT A BREAK FROM THINKING ABOUT THE POTTY?"

  • Use humor and play to redirect the situation without laughing at your child. For example, "I DONT HAVE ANY MORE DIAPERS". "LET'S MAKE PRETEND DIAPERS OUT OF TOWELS AND PUT THEM ON YOUR TEDDY BEARS."

  • Address the need in other ways. Sometimes it's not about the diapers but the ambiguity of growing up. Validate the need with simple words like "I LOVE IT WHEN YOUR WERE A BABY AND I TOOK CARE YOU ALL THE TIME. LETS PLAN SOME SPECIAL TIME FOR JUST YOU AND ME." Then add morning snuggle time together, time each day to look at baby pictures, take an evening walk, or go on a saturday afternoon ice cream outing.