Wednesday, December 9, 2009

What To Do When Your Child Is Having Accidents Because He Knows It Annoys You

Most of the time, your child's accidents are genuine mistakes. Its possible, how ever, that your child's behavior has become a game, particularly if you have allowed your emotions to rule your reactions. When children learn that they can push parents buttons, they are most compelled to do so. It gives them power, albeit inappropriate power. They can pull you into an ever-escalating emotional drama. They get attention they win, in child-logic anyways.One sure way out of the game is to neutralize your emotional response. Take a time out. Count to ten. Count fifty. Here's one script for a hypothetical situation.

Describe: "I see you pooped on the carpet again and i see you laughing about it" Problem solve: "Im not laughing, and i want to clean up the floor before we do anything else". Be positive: "this isn't fun for me. You can tell me in other ways if you don't want to use the potty."

The next step is to continue the problem solving about the accident. The game is often initiated during one of those oppositional stages in development when your child is strongly asserting his independence. If so, explain to your child that it is not okay to choose the floor instead of the potty. If the actions was attention getting, the behavior will stop when you are not emotionally engaged by the actions.

As much as you might like to, you cannot force your child to use the potty. Although you may be angry at your child's willfulness, the best long term strategy is always to pull back from struggle. By doing this, You will shorten the oppositional standoff and prevent escalating misbehavior.

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