Thursday, December 10, 2009

My Child Is Using The Potty At Home But Not At School

Your potty team includes your child's teacher and caregivers. While there many differences between pottying at home and pottying at school, communication is the key to managing those differences. You want to know as much as possible about the potty routines at school.


  • What time do the children potty?

  • Do the children go potty as a group or individually?

  • Is the teacher near the children or at the door?

  • How do the teacher talk to the children about successes and mistakes?

  • How do the other children talk about successes and mistakes?

  • How is your child doing in non potty related school activities?

Any differences from home can create resistance to pottying at school. Stay positive about the school and about the teachers as you help your child adapt her home skills to this new world away from home.


  • Give your child time if she just started a new school, has a new teacher, or is in a new class. She will master the potty part of her day after she masters the other changes.

  • Share your home strategies with your child's teachers to create a familiar experience for your child. For example, the teacher might enjoy singing your child's potty songs or reading your child's My Potty Book.

  • Build trust in the teacher. Your child might not understand that the teacher is ready and willing to help. For example, "Ms. SO AND SO CAN HELP YOU WITH YOUR PANTS, JUST TELL HER WHEN YOU NEED HER... AND BE SURE SHES LISTENING WHEN YOU TALK." Try role playing if your child is hesitant.

  • Ask the teacher if your child can potty last if she is overwhelmed by a group of children in a bathroom. Another option is to have your child taken solo.

  • Write your child encouraging notes that can either be put in her lunchbox or delivered by the teacher at potty time. Make it reader friendly by copying some home/school potty pictures or just a big "I LOVE YOU" heart.

  • Give potty reports back and forth from school to home. Keep it light, "JUST CHECKING" Let your child see that you and the teacher are working together in a positive way.
Some schools will adapt to your child's potty needs while other will ask your child to adapt to the school routine. Trust and communication are essential either way.

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